Internet wasnt available last night, so its now or never i guess..

.. i wrote it down on paper as to not forget it last night..


I cant tell you what it really is
I can only tell you part of what it feels like
I cant breath but i still try to fight..
I know i shouldnt push
People away but i cant
Help the way my mind thinks
And drags me away, cause im far
From this reality, I sway
To the dark side and ignore
The way, people think, feel..
Act around me cause,
I am afraid. Afraid ill get hurt
Cause i got treated like dirt many times,
Before and wont let it happen again
She damaged me, created someone im not
Im not gunna lie
Cause i DONT like the way it hurts
Cause i been there before
And I care about you to much...


As much as id love to give it a go
This is the one thing that I cant,
Let down my defences, blow down the walls
And through caution to the wind
Cause i know that it hurts
And im scared to let it go and let
Life take its course.
I dont like the way that it hurts
And yeah, I know im not Marshall Mathers 
But its easier for me 
To spit on a rhyme, so let it be
Cause otherwise you would have never know-n
I guess i shouldnt be saying this
But it needs to be said, this
Helplessness is growing stronger and stronger
I dont know what love is, thought i had it before
But now im just running, running from her.. 
Love is undecided on a him or a her
But I think im to far gone 
For that shit, so lead me on..
Down this 8 mile road..


"Comletely numb", way to far 
From the truth are you and her
From my life, the real me
All the pain, so much anger aimed
In no particular direction
Just sprayed and sprayed
Let my secret life, yes the kone you know
Lead you astray, away from this place..
Away from the anger, hurt and pain
Theres nothing in life I can gain
Im just a no-one that hurts 
Other people, and watches them burn


She cant control her actions
So she tries to act out an animation
On television to create another life
One where there is no pain and strife
So i guess she was stupid pulling a razored knife to her arms
Not sure why she did now. She was so stupid 
All those years ago..


Dont tell me to be calm 
So Superman was born in the palm
Of he hands to become a new person
One completely numb
One to cheer up her chums when
They were down to stop them
Becoming just as dumb, as her
To help them out of the fire
She created, so they no longer burn


But then again,
"Superman's a jackass"
So i guess im not needed no more
Face slammed right into the floor
Tonight im slamming the door
Cant take this no more
So "fml" has become an old routine
No longer floating on 
False prentences
Tonight im building brand new fences
And walls, once again to hide
From the world, thanks. Your kind.


Dont know what to think or feel
Just wanna get off this fucking wheel
"i love you", its possible that I do
This is all stressful
My lifes not as simple, as say a 
Game of pool..
Sink a ball and you simply score
Everything holds soo much more
Detail, problems and dead ends

Once again to be oblivious to the world

Now im ready for mine to unfold.

But Supermans a jackass
So what does he care..


Emma.